it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize