and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
