I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
