I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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