I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
