I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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