So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
