Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I wish there were birth control emojis
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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