She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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