hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
