well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
