covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
