she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
