that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I still have a little drunk in my system
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
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