have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
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