There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i think i have herpe
just one?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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