At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
