people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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