Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
