Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
