sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
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I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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