Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
