so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
