you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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