and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize