I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
