Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
