let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
