I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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