Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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