Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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