All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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