I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
