He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
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I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
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Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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