So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
