yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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