That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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