hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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