pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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