Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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