I skipped work to stalk him.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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