Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
