I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
