I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
