CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
