would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
