I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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