lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
