my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
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the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
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Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.