just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
