I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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