fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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